I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
