she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Randomize
