I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
