Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I fill condoms, not promises.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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