I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
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