Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
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