She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
