There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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