i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
