just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Alive.
So much puke
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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