last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
