i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
