you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
