she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
