the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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