Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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