It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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