hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
