elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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