Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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