you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
where are my pants?
in the oven.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
