You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
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