My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize