he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
