she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize