Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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