I bet he comes in French.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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