You work out of a Hotel?
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
