so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
