I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
