I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
im drinking this country out of the recession.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
