farters have to be the big spoon...
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
