He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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