What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Watching her eat just hurts me
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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