I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
