Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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