its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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