umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Randomize
