I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
