There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
