Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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