Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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