hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
you told grandpa to call you daddy
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Randomize
