Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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