i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
