yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Nobody cheats on THIS.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
