you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
