Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
