I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize