I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize
