I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize